Single Parenting and Green Beans

For most people the daily life of the single parent is far from their thoughts.  If the thought of single parenthood even crosses their mind, many of them default to the stereotypical “welfare queen” watching Oprah, smoking crack, and screaming at her unruly children, each of whom has his or her own biological father.  Unfortunately, this viewpoint is the polar opposite of what the working single parent experiences on a daily basis.

Being a full-time employed single parent is tough.  Multiple tasks throughout the day, up early and to bed late, the daily crises to deal with, helping with homework, quite possibly adult children’s needs to address and/or a disabled child’s needs, wrestling with the education and state-level bureaucracies, meals to cook, transportation, making the money stretch, the house to clean, laundry to wash, and the list goes on.  There is never an unfilled moment.

Although it seems an impossible task, there is help.  God provides for those who are raising children alone.  Yes, it means rising even earlier to spend time alone with Him, but the time with God is what prepares us for days filled with constant bombardment and responsibilities.  Yes, each day does have enough problems of its own, which is why time with the Lord cannot be sacrificed.  Yes, there is no time “alone” for a single parent.  A single parent is always doing something with or for someone else and, yes, there is no way around this reality – at least until the children are adults and on their own (sort of).

For those single parents who have a permanently disabled child that will not leave the home in your lifetime, there are support mechanisms that allow us a respite from this awesome responsibility.  And though we count it all joy, we do need to recharge our personal batteries from time to time.  Yes, it takes a great deal of coordination, time, and energy to obtain those outside-supported lulls, but until they kick in, sisters in Christ or friends can lend a hand.

In the meantime, we face the task at hand and live life on life’s terms.

I’ve found meal planning is a simple task whose rewards are great.  Not only can nutritious meals find their way to the table, the big benefit is saving time (think Cheaper by the Dozen).

An example is this past weekend.  I prepared ribs Friday night, marinating them overnight in the crock pot.  When I arose Saturday morning, I simply removed the meal from the refrigerator, plugged in the crock pot, set it for ten hours, and the main entrée was on its way to completion.  Turning to laundry, the first load went into the washer a few minutes after turning on the crock pot, and all of it was complete by ten.  Since I insist on rinsing dishes after meals, the few dishes from Friday night completed filling the dishwasher and away the dishes went to the cleaning cycle.  The breakfast was simple but satisfying, re-heating the extra oatmeal from Friday morning.  By noon the laundry, dishes, and general housecleaning was complete, and the two youngest and I were on our way to a matinee.  At five, I prepared the baked potatoes, placed them in the oven, and then began working on the green beans and salad, which took approximately thirty minutes.  By six-thirty we were seated, eating our meal and enjoying one another’s company, joking about the comedy we’d seen during the matinee.

Each day will present its own challenges and some interruptions to plans can always be expected.  Yet, I find that beginning the day with Him, and eating healthy throughout the day, prepares me for the inevitable crises I will encounter in each day that has enough trouble of its own.  No, I do not look forward to a better future or what is behind, I press forward and enjoy the now with the precious gifts God has entrusted me with to cherish and nurture.

Don’t get me wrong, I have personal desires and needs – including favorite recipes (see below).  However, one’s view must be “not my will, but His be done.”  For this season in my life is dedicated to the next generation.  If it’s God’s will that I one day remarry, then His will be done.  If not, then life in Him will continue and He will provide me the daily strength for the task at hand.

So if you’ve reached this far in today’s post, then please pray for all of us single parents.  We covet your prayers and need all the help we can get – especially in the spiritual realm.

The following recipe is a big hit with the children.  I’ve made notes where I’ve modified the recipe.  I’ve also included the URL to the website.

Green Beans in Sour Cream & Tomato Sauce

1 lb. green beans – about three cups – trimmed and halved crosswise
4 tbsp. butter
1 large onion, halved lengthwise and thinly sliced (I use a half-onion)
1 medium-sized green pepper, seeded, deribbed and chopped (Using sweet peppers really enhances the naturally sweet taste of fresh green beans.  Use 5-6 sweet peppers.  This usually equals a medium-sized green bell pepper.)
2 large tomatoes, peeled, seeded and chopped (You can substitute a can of tomato sauce.)
2 tbsp. finely chopped fresh basil (“Fresh” is the key here.)
3/4 cup sour cream
salt
freshly ground black pepper

Drop the beans into lightly salted boiling water. Boil, uncovered for about 10 minutes, or until tender and still somewhat firm to the bite. Drain beans and set aside.

In a heavy skillet, melt the butter over moderate heat. Add the onion and green pepper and cook until soft, but not browned, stirring frequently. Add the tomatoes and basil and cook for 2 minutes, stirring often. Add the beans, mix well and lower the heat and simmer for 2 minutes. Beat the sour cream with salt and pepper (to taste) and stir it into the vegetables gently, but thoroughly. Taste for seasoning.

Serves 4

http://www.greenbeansnmore.com/recipe-m.html